Tuesday, September 20, 2011

4th Quarter here we go...

I need to come up big to end the year strong. I mean, I didn't do much this year so any progress is great progress!

Last week I left for Vegas on a whim and won $1500 at Blackjack! But my overhead included $60 hotel room, $80 for gas and just found out I blew out my alternator for a whopping $700! FUCK!!!

It was fun though. I went there for business only. Didn't drink, holla at any girls, just stayed focused on Blackjack. I had $6600 cash on me. WTF? At one time I was in for $3200. WHAT THE FUCK?!?!? But at the end I got lucky and left +$1500. What a rush...

I'm thinking I should go back...but this time just bring $3200 and try to make $3000. We'll see...

Still need $6K by the end of the month...we'll see how I'll get it without asking the parents.

My phone just rang. I hate picking up my phone when random numbers call. It's either a debt collector or someone trying to hit me up for bullshit.

"Hello? Hello??? Listen I can't hear you...by the way...FUCK OFF! I don't have your money!!!"

Thursday, September 8, 2011

33 and 3 months...

I'm an old fuck. I'm an old fuck but good fuck. What have I been up to...

June came and went. Just did a jazz show and cooked for peeps at the house. It was cool I guess. Cool for a 33 year old dammit.

July I went to Vegas. August I went to Lima, Rio de Janiero, and Buenos Aires with my parents and sister. It was cool and cold. Didn't know it was winter time in South America. Isn't it hot there all the damn time? I guess not!

Now what? Same shit, different day. In a bowling league again. This will be my 3rd year. I'm gonna fuck shit up this year. Just need to slow down my tempo and smooth out my roll. I'm gonna be the boss tonight!

Other than that same shit. Need to work out a payment plan with my lender. Haven't paid April through present. Thinking of foreclosing and moving to the beach with the $18,000 I'll be saving. SHIT! FUCK! It's time to make moves!

Need a $50,000 Medicare season this year. How? Enroll 100 members. How? It helps that a carrier is going to give me a shirt, banner, and table to post in front of Rite Aid. I need a big year. Otherwise I'm moving back with my parents. FML.

That's all folks. Still not all that motivated with work, bitches, life. Am getting back into my fitness, tennis and being outdoors. Fuck being broke and depressed. I'd rather be broke and have a nice body...then maybe I can get a dick surgery and become a porn star! They are hiring now since the AIDS break out in the industry...

Peace out. Gotta walk the dog, run errands, and attend a bullshit carrier seminar...

Friday, May 13, 2011

ADD vs me: ADD wins in a landslide


It's been too long.

Columbia was AMAZING! The girls, the coke, the landscape...everything was awesome. I want to go back and visit Medellin due to it's popularity on Entourage and all the whores I fucked where from there.

March happened.

April happened. Ran a 5K in Carlsbad. Beat my time last year by 1 second! LOL! I'm getting better I guess.

And now it's May. I'm losing my motivation. I'm not finding any pleasure in my career. The only pleasure I enjoy is watching and betting on NBA basketball (which I can't do anymore because CC fucked shit up and we got cut) and watching and jerking off to spankwire.com. Just today at the gym CNN reported that Osama Bin Laden had a stash of porn at his compound. Great! I have a commonality with the most wanted man of the decade. HOORAY! I wish I had some of his money in common too but I don't.

Speaking of I am 2 months late on my mortgage. I'm falling behind on my bills and not motivated to close any new deals.

I want to start my mobile food van already. FUCK. I should ask my parents for some money.

My NYC girlfriend dumped me. She didn't feel like our relationship was going anywhere. DUH! All we do is text each other. No fucking. And all we did was kiss last year.

"FUCK YOU BITCH. You have a 1-year old daughter. I have $0 in the bank. It's not gonna work out..."

Not in those words but "I wanted $1 million in my bank before I settled down with my family. I'm giving myself 6-7 years to do so...so don't wait for me..."

Oh well.

It really got me thinking...I need to impregnate a girl that makes $250K a year and be Mr. Mom. Shit I don't give a mad fuck. Time for a revolution! Let's make these bitches work while we take care of the household. It's actually more stressful and more tiring cooking, cleaning and taking care of the kids...!

I'm talking to this nurse from San Francisco. I met her through mutual friends. We slept in the same bed in Vegas but we didn't fuck. Don't like fucking girls with other people in the room. Especially when it was her girl cousin and cousin's gay roommate in the same room. Awkward! I'm going up to SF Memorial Day weekend to see her. Can't wait. Hopefully she'll let me sleep over. If not then I fucked up and should have fucked her raw in Vegas...!

Now what. I need to scrape up $5K. Was thinking of going to the race track and Vegas.


Oh and I went online to see if I can buy Adderall online. Well I can, but I have to mail in a prescription.


Tuesday, February 1, 2011


I'm motivated to jerk off and do jack shit!

Maybe I should re-up on Aderral. WHY? Because CC fucking beat me at tennis last night at his complex 7-6 (7-5).

In the tiebreaker tied at 5-5 I fucking tried to do the same lame slice backhand and hit it in the net twice to lose the one and only set we played!

All good because we went back and I bet $310 to win $200 on the Clippers! CC's bookie better come through with my money tomorrow. I need that shit for Columbia! Not only that, I spent $100 to get my iPhone fixed (I tried to replace the back of my phone with a new black back cover but failed miserably and even broke the speaker) and spend $100 on Friday night and went clubbing with my sister and cousin. I spent hella money on drinks and a re-entry fee because my cousin didn't want to watch the show and wanted to get Popeye's and get dropped off at home! FUCK!

All good because I met this hot Russian chick named Dina. I called that tall blonde bitch last night but left a message. I hope to fuck her when I get back from Columbia...

So yeah just been bullshittin and not working. I guess I'm in vacation mode. Not only that I've been wasting my soldiers on porn. I need to stop watching porn, get my testosterone up, and man the fuck up...and fuck fuck fuck in Columbia next week!

My prediction for Superbowl 45...Pittsburg Steelers! I'm gonna put a hundee on 'em (if I get paid tomorrow)!

Peace out motherfuckers...

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

HNY muthafuckas!!!

It's 2011...Already??? SHIT!!!

Where did I leave off...oh yeah, NYC last September 2010. I hung out with her and her daughter, I hung out with other friends, we made out, but we didn't have sex. Didn't really have the opportunity to. Oh well.

October nothing major...November was in Hawaii with family...December went to Ecuador with my mom and my sister. Christmas was in Las Vegas. New Years was in Thousand Oaks.

I killed the Medicare sales for 2011. Waiting for my goddamn $8500 commission check. I was thinking of buying a used 330ci but can't find one under $10K. So I'll probably just buy a $1K MacBook so I can start editing film: comedy, drama, and maybe even porn!

Last month met a fashion chick with a fine roommate. And last week I met a pornstar and her sister. I need to holla at them. But a few days ago I came across this:


I love this girl so much. I don't need to know her, and I don't care about her past. But I want to spend the rest of my life with her. Look at this letter I forwarded to my future groomsmen:

Dear Kendall http://www.eros-la.com/files/195595.htm,

I love you so much. I know I can't stop saying that, but it's so true...

I can't wait to wake up next to you every single day, and fall asleep next to you every single night.

We're gonna have so many kids together it's not even funny...


P.S. XOXOXOXOXOXO 143 24/7 all day e'ry day!!! I miss you Baby...

Going to Columbia next month. Gonna wild the fuck out! Coke and whores. I'm scared!

In March gonna go snowboarding again in Park City. But I don't have any Adderral left! And I don't want to re-up!

So I'm on this diet pills that have Acai and a bunch of caffeine. Not the same effect but I don't like the side effects of Adderral:

-loss in appetite
-weight loss
-mood swings

So I'm doing it all-natural in addition to the diet pills:

-Ginko Binobla
-St. John's Wart
-fish oil

We'll see what happens. I'm probably gonna get some after March...probably.