Saturday, August 30, 2008

Lost Wages, Nevada

Sin City. Gotta love this place.

It's every grown mans' Disneyworld.


I'll tell you why:

-Drugs (mostly alcohol, but other substances are consumed here as well)
-Rock and roll, oldies, hip-hop, house, jazz, etc.
-Butt naked ladies dancing to R & R, oldies, hip-hop, house, jazz, etc.
-The chance to make money
-The chance to escape the everyday mundane world of waking up in the morning, shaving, driving to work in traffic, clocking in, having lunch with co-workers, daydreaming in the cubicle, clocking out, driving home in traffic, prime time TV...

It's Labor Day Weekend here. I have some friends here that want to hang out.

But it's going to be the same thing as times past: get to the club, get denied access, and get forced to hand over the credit card and ID so we can pop bottles at the table.

After the VIP entrance experience, and having eyes of envy watch us enter the venue, the half naked cocktail waitress/hostess hands over a menu of overpriced bottles. Vodka that usually retails for $40 at the grocery store is priced at $400. With mixers you are looking at $650 for 4 guests at your table. Hmmmmph!!!

Is the $650 worth it? Maybe. If you are able to close on one of the many girls who approach your table that ask if it's "okay to sit at your table because their feet hurt..." but in reality they want free drinks and they think you're a baller so you're thinking you're going to get laid. Hmmmmmph! I honestly think these clubs hire hot looking girls to flirt with male patrons...

I'm going to have dinner with my friend who works at Spearmint Rhino and who recently got fake breasts.

I'm going to play the Mr. Nice Guy and the innocent idiot, and be like "Wow you look more beautiful then ever! I don't know what it is, I can't put my finger on it..." and deny that I know that she got fake tits.

Upon revealing that she got a boob job, I'm going to ask:

Do you mind if I touch them?"

She's great; she's El Salvadorian and is real skinny and has a nice ass. Cute face with DSLs. No silly, not Digital Subscriber Line you freaking dork...

My roommate says I have no chance. He thinks she's a lesbian. He could be right or he could be wrong, but I'm a goddamm equal opportunity employer! I don't hate or discriminate...bisexual candiates who are hired recieve a signing bonus, paid vacation, and employer sponsored benefits.

Funny thing is...she is the girl that was in a photo pouring a Grey Goose bottle that I used to display in my house until my girlfriend saw it and got jealous...

So wish me luck. Planning to take her to Cheesecake Factory or something decent. I just had a big dinner so I'm probably going to order something small so she doesn't order alot too and I can save money. If we both drink tonight, it's on like Teflon, because she doesn't have work until 4am. We're supposed to grab a bite @ 8pm. That's a lot of down time...for me to feel her up time!

If I can't take it back to her pad and hit before she has to leave for work, then I'm going to a locals' bar to try my luck at some Vegas sluts.

Fuck a club, I'm good.

I left Hollywood this weekend for a reason.

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